Monday, May 23, 2005

tomorrow.....

tomorrow kpp has his surgery...its kinda weird because im just alittle scared...usually im sooooo scared about everything...but i know i have to be strong for kpp...he has a long recovery period...so that's what really worries me..how will his recovery be...im sooooo overprotective...i know he will get sick of me...not letting him climb on stuff...not letting him get down by himself...but oh well...its for his safety really...

dad will go with me tomorrow..and im kinda noided out...like i know he will not want to talk much..and im suuuch a talker lol...he is like a church mouse sometimes...well all the time...so i guess i need to take lots of magazines...so i have something to do...oh well...we are soo different...i hope kpp learns from the both of us...the good and bad qualities that we both have...and take the best between us two....

i honestly hope and prays the kpp becomes a great man...with a sense of himself and love for his family..neither me or dad have that strong family safety net...not to say we dont love our family but we shy away easily...its always easy to hide behind what your family wants you to be...when you really havent reached their expected goals...its always easy to pretend that you are "that person" when in reality you really arent...but with all that said...i want kpp to loooove his family...i wish i had more children (at least one lol) so he isnt the only child...but i know i probably wont have anymore lol...i just dont want him to be alone...an only child with all those issues!!!!!...especially the issue of an overprotective mother lol...his little butt will be in theraphy as soon as he can talk lol...if i had at least one more child lol i dont think i would have the time to be THAT overprotective lol...who am i kidding...i would be the same way...just more tired lol....

okay im going to bed...we have a big day ahead...and i want to be rested up so i dont talk dad's ear off! lol....

2 comments:

Nappy Hair said...

Well I kinda feel the same way about family. Especially with JP haha. Everytime I talk to him I feel like a failure. I am thinking I probably won't ever have a kid and there goes my dad's hopes and dreams. My mom thinks I'm crazy and I hardly tell her anything about what's going on in my life without a healthy cushioning. And above all I keep a healthy dose of lies for myself.

As far as KPP being an only child, he should be so lucky! You are not looking at it from all perspectives. Having other children around is great and he will have that as soon as he is in Pre-K or Kindergarten. But on the plus side, he gets all the attention, all the love. There won't be any issues of competition. You won't have to say, "No, I love you both the same." LOL. I think being an only child can be great if you have a great parent like you've been. But either way I think it has it's benifits.

If you wait long enough then he'll be old enough to help you out haha. You can say, "KPP! Go get me some diapers" etc. LOL.

Nappy Hair said...

Oh btw, good luck with tomorrow. . .or is that today? I am sure everything will be fine.