Saturday, December 11, 2004

KINDA LONELY

tonight im feeling lonely...i think my son can feel that im sad...because he keeps coming over to hug me and or kiss me...its crazy how they know and sense everything....i love him sooo much...and just as i say that he starts whinning lol...

i think im feeling lonely because im thinking too much tonight...just about my past...i just feel like i need some love tonight...someone to just lay in bed with...and do absolutely nothing with...or read a good book...or listen to some good music...

when i think about the past...i always seem to get sad...because i dont have what i had...the joy of coming home to see someone you love...or waiting at home til they come...the joy of listening to them just babble about nothing at all..the joy of cooking (and i hate to cook) for them...and watching for the "this is nasty" look to come on their face...i just miss the joys i used to have in my soul...and now it seems like i only get them from someone who doesnt even know his own name hahahaha...my son...thats not to say those are super special joys...its just not what im talking about...

but its okay...im going to finish looking up things on ebay...and get in the bed...

i think my present life is okay...my son is great...he is a real joy to me...but my relationship life makes me sad.....oh well..i was just thinking...

and seems like tonight thinking makes me alittle sad...

by the morning...life will be okay again :) night

1 comments:

Starfighter Girl said...

Well I am wondering. . . can I get some pics of your place??? I saw some of it in the background with those pics of Khalil and I was totally jealous.

Your Cuz